She said ‘Decree and Destiny.’

IMG_2414Umm Aban bint Utbah rejected proposal from not just one man, but from three men from among Ashrah Mubasharah (The ten given glad tidings of Jannah)

Her insight into the men and their personalities is discerning. A righteous man, or a well known leader of the ummah doesn’t necessarily mean he will be the best husband for you. In fact Umar ibn khattab divorced many times – I’m sure the women who married him must’ve thought how amazing it is to be married to the Ameer al Mumineen. But in reality, what he does for the ummah and his station in akhirah may not necessarily mean any benefit for you.

Another striking part of the story is the flexibility in gender interaction. How often can brothers address their friend’s wives about her personal opinions and choices? It is unheard of. But yet we see Ali openly questioning Talha’s wife as to why she rejected his proposal and married Talha! He later on even comments that she married because of his good looks.

SubhanAllah, look at how relaxed and pure their interactions and communications were between genders. Today, we’ve made such rigid rules of interactions, and view everything of the opposite gender as suspicious and impure.

Please read the story below:

She journeyed to Syria and witnessed its opening to Islam with her brother Abu Hashim and her husband Aban ibn Sa’id. She was widowed on the day of the Battle of Ajnadayn. It is said that they were together no more than two nights before she was widowed. Another version says her husband who was killed was Yazid ibn Abu Sufyan. IMG_2425

When she was widowed, ‘Umar proposed to her and she rejected him. She was asked “Why?” She said, “When he enters, he enters sternly and when he leaves, he leaves sternly. He is preoccupied by his Hereafter from his worldly affairs, as if he were staring his Lord in the eye.” Another version has it, “He enters frowning and he leaves frowning. His doors are closed and his giving is little.”

Then Zubayr ibn al-Awwam proposed to her and she rejected him. She was asked, “Why?” She said, “A wife gets nothing from him but chores and work to secure his needs. And he says, ‘I did this’ and, ‘I did that’, and ‘I am this’, and ‘I am that’.”

Then ‘Ali proposed to her and she rejected him. She was asked, “Why?” And she said, “Women have no luck when they are with him … ” [abridgement]

Then Talhah proposed to her and she said, “Marry me, truly.” People said, “How is this?” She said, “I truly know his moral character. When he enters, he enters laughing and when he leaves he leaves smiling. When he is asked, he gives. When I withdraw, he inquires; when I work, he thanks; and when I do wrong, he forgives.”

‘Ali was visiting them in their home and he said [to her husband], “Abu Muhammad, may I speak to Umm Aban?” He said, “Speak to her.” ‘Ali said, “As-salamu alayki, oh woman who is dear to herself.” She said, “Alayk as-salam.” He said, “The Leader of the Believers, Chief of the Muslims, proposed to you and you rejected him.”

IMG_2393“That is so.”

“And I proposed to you and I am from the Prophet and you rejected me.”
“That is so.”

In another version, ‘Ali added, “You refused all those whom you refused, and married this son of the daughter of Al-Hadrami.” She said “Decree and destiny.” ‘Ali replied, “You know, you married the one of us who was most beautiful of face, the one with the best hand, and the one with the most goodness toward his family.”

‪#‎ForgottenHeroines‬
[Translated and abridged from A’lam an-Nisa by ‘Umar Kahhala, vol. 1, p. 21]

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Benefit Vs Hardship. [Ibn Taymiyyahs Wisdom]

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“…And it should be known that Allah’s Pleasure and Love are not dependent on you torturing yourself and going through hardship, such that something is better simply on account of how hard it is. It is assumed by many ignorant people that the reward is obtained in accordance with hardship in everything. No! Rather, the reward is in accordance with the benefit of the act and how much it manifests obedience to Allah and His Messenger.

So, the more beneficial an act and the more obedient its doer, the more virtuous it is. Actions aren’t virtuous due to their quantity. Rather, they are virtuous due to the effect they have on the heart.

This is why when the sister of ‘Uqbah bin ‘Amir made a vow to perform Hajj walking barefoot, the Prophet (صلى الله عليه و سلم) said: “Indeed, Allah is not in need of your sister torturing herself. Have her continue while riding.” It was narrated that he had her slaughter an animal, and it was also narrated that he had her fast. The same applies to the hadith of Juwayriyah when she was performing tasbih using pebbles before noon, and he came back at night and found her sitting in the same position. So, he said to her: “I said four words three times that would outweigh all that you have said today.” 3225_1280x800

The point of all this is to know that Allah didn’t command us to do except what is beneficial for us, and He didn’t forbid us except from what is harmful to us. This is why Allah praises righteous acts and encourages righteousness and benefit, and discourages corruption and harm.

Allah forbade us from filthy things due to the harm and corruption they bring about, and He commanded us with righteous acts due to the benefit they bring about. It might be the case that such actions cannot be performed except with some hardship, such as Jihad, enjoining the good, preventing the bad, seeking knowledge, etc. So, all of this is obtained through hardship, and one is rewarded for them due to the benefit that they result in. This is like when the Prophet (صلى الله عليه و سلم) said to ‘A’ishah when she performed ‘Umrah from at-Tan’im in the year of the Farewell Hajj: “Your reward is in accordance with your effort.”

However, if the benefit of the act does not outweigh the hardship it involves, this is a form of ruin and corruption, and Allah does not love corruption.

An example of this is in worldly benefits. Enduring hardship to make a great gain or repel a great enemy is praiseworthy. As for one who endures great effort and hardship in order to make an insignificant amount of money or to repel a very minor harm, he is just like a person who pays a thousand dirhams in exchange for a hundred, or one who walks for an entire day to get a meal while he could’ve gotten a better meal in the very town he lives in.

So, the legislated and recommended course of action is all about  justice, balance, and moderation – which are the best and loftiest of affairs – just as the Firdaws is both the highest part of Paradise and the middle (i.e. best) part of it. So, whoever is like this will have this as his destination, by Allah’s Permission…”

[‘Majmu’ al-Fatawa’; 25/126-127]

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Former Days Are Gone…

IMG_2349Reading too much into the past is a waste of the present. When Allah mentioned the affairs of the previous nations, He, the exalted, said:

That was a nation who has passed away.  Quran 2: 134

Former days are gone and done with, and you benefit nothing by carrying out an autopsy over them, by turning back the wheels of history. The person who lives in the past is like someone who tries to saw sawdust. Of old, they used to say:

Do not remove the dead from their graves.

Our tragedy is that we are incapable of dealing with the present: neglecting our beautiful castles, we wail over dilapidated buildings. If every man and every jinn were to try jointly to bring back the past, they would most certainly fail. Everything on earth marches forward, preparing for a new season – and so should you.

Taken from ‘Don’t be Sad’ by Shaikh Aidh al Qarni

 

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“All our Wishes & Hopes will Come True”

IMG_2353“Keep ties with your companions, for a loyal companion is like a glowing lantern, perhaps his light will not reach you except when the world turns dark on you.” ~ Hasan Al-Basri

“When Allah intends good for His servant, He will create for him a heart that admonishes him to do good and prevents him from evil.”~ Muhammad ibn Sireen

“Whoever learns something in the name of Allah, seeking that which is with Him, he will win. And whoever learns something for other than Allah, he will not reach the goal, nor will his acquired knowledge bring him closer to Allah.”~ Hasan al-Basri

“If people let you down, specifically those beloved and close to you, or if you put your hope in someone after Allah and they don’t come through, at that point know that Allah wants you to turn to Him.” ~  Muhammad b. Muhammad al-Mukhtar al-Shinqiti

“Truly between us and Allah there is a link that cannot be broken, and if we devote ourselves to honoring this link, all of our wishes and hopes will come true.” ~ Muhammad al-Ghazali

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Because You Are Reading the Greatest of Books

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“…It is recommended to use miswak and to clean your mouth before reciting the Qur’an, as well as to cleanse your body using some kind of pleasant scent in order to respect the time in which you are reading.

Wear the clothes that you would wear in front of others to look good, because you are in front of the Bestower despite this privacy. The one who recites someone else’s words is like one who is speaking on his behalf, and this is the pinnacle of honor from Allah.

It is recommended to be sitting and to be facing the Qiblah. Sa’id bin al-Musayyab was asked about a hadith while he was leaning back. So, he sat up and said: “I hate to relay the words of the Messenger of Allah (صلى الله عليه و سلم) while I’m leaning back,” and the Words of Allah are even more deserving of such an attitude.

And it is recommended to have ablution…”

[‘al-Hadith fi ‘Ulum al-Qur’an wal-Hadith’; p. 67]

Translated by our dear beloved brother Tarek Mehanna – may Allah keep him steadfast and honour him in the this world and the next Allahumma Ameen

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“Because of your Abundant Tears & Du’aa”

red-flowers-macroImam Al-Bukhari’s mother was a pious and ascetic woman, and was blessed with a sincere du’a. It is narrated that Imam Al-Bukhari went blind in his youth and she saw an amazing dream: she saw Al-Khalil, Prophet Ibrahim (peace be upon him), and he said to her, ‘O you, Allah has returned your son’s eyesight because of your abundant tears and du’a’.

They woke up and Allah had returned his eyesight.

[Tarikh Baghdad, 2/10, Siyar, 12/393, Intro of ‘Al-Fatih’, 502]

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“The problem is not with my Lord.”

 3997237600_b755dda490  Ibn al-Qayyim related from al-Jariri:

 “I was told of a man from the Children of Israel who had a need that he wanted fulfilled by Allah.So, he engaged in constant worship and then asked Allah for his need. When he did not see that his need was fulfilled, he spent the night blaming himself, saying: “O self! What is wrong with you that is preventing your need from being fulfilled?”

And he spent the night sad and holding himself to account, saying: “By Allah, the problem is not with my Lord. Rather, the problem is with myself,” and he remained in such a state of holding himself responsible until his need was finally taken care of.”

[‘Ighathat al-Lahfan’; 1/77]

Taken from our imprisoned brother Tarek Mehannas benenficial blog:

http://iskandrani.wordpress.com/2008/12/20/the-problem-is-not-with-my-lord/

may Allah hasten his release and reunite him with his beloved family ameen

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